starting a conversation with someone can be harder than it looks. from the moment you first match with someone, there's pressure to start a good conversation – but how do you know whether they're interested in the same things as you? there are lots of easy ways to start a conversation, but if you want to stand out from the rest (and get a response), then it's worth trying that little bit harder to make the perfect first impression.
1. confidence is key
confidence is one of the most important things when starting a conversation with someone. if it's a match, then odds are you're both hoping it'll lead to a good conversation - and eventually a date! if you're shy, it's much easier to fake it till you make it when starting a conversation by text; if you're naturally confident, just make sure you let that winning personality shine through without coming across as arrogant.
when meeting up in person, it helps to make good eye contact with the person you are trying to talk with. when making eye contact, ensure that your eyes are focused directly on theirs, but look away every now and then as prolonged eye contact can be a bit overwhelming! just make sure you're not looking around while they're talking; otherwise, they'll feel like you're not listening to them.
2. give honest compliments.
one thing you can do to start conversations is to give honest compliments about something you saw on their profile. this is a great way to build rapport quickly because it shows that you actually paid attention to their profile, which they likely put a lot of effort into! this will help them feel more positive towards you from the very start of the conversation. just be sure that your compliment is genuine and welcome - remember, 'nice tits' does NOT count.
3. listen and engage in the conversation
this applies to both online and offline communication. if you're messaging someone on a dating app, odds are you're both also messaging other people. referencing something they've said earlier in the conversation helps show you're focusing on them. likewise, if you're meeting in person, the best way to start a conversation is actually by listening. pay attention to what they're saying, ask relevant questions and give meaningful responses. most importantly, try not to talk over them when they are talking.
show interest in the person
showing interest in the other person will make them feel valued, leading to more trust and rapport-building between you two. try asking open-ended questions that require your listener to think about their answer, while avoiding yes/no or leading questions.
if you're interested in starting a conversation, think about what you have in common with the person you've matched with. once you've discovered something you have in common, you can create a great date to get to know them better - plus, if you pick a fun or exciting venue you may be surprised at how much you get out of your head and just enjoy yourself!
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